Eden Lake – Review

Right… from the start I feel a bit angry about the ending so I think that’s something I will rant about but to be honest I am starting to wonder if that makes this a good or bad film. I certainly don’t classify this as horror however… more “idiots make good”.

The premise is simple – boy and girl getting engaged, nice white middle-class yada yada let’s go on holiday to a Lake.

Insert “rough lads” known to us faithfully random English as Chav. Chav – Council House and Violent. In the USA I think they’d be the equivalent to Trailer Trash or something. Who knows… basically they are the ones that are on an estate and get labelled.

Firstly – if your car tyres were slashed by a bunch of freaking idiot kids that didn’t respect the law would you be stupid enough to pick a fight? Well I for one would not. I’d ring the damned police. Problem solved. Movie over.

Let’s say you don’t but you then spot where they live (BMX’s on the drive) you’d have enough to get the police in a second time. Movie over.

Okay so now Middle class man is in the house snooping. At what point would you seriously risk breaking into someone else’s home to have a word with the parents? Walk away. Call the police – oh again MOVIE OVER!

All this aside let’s move on to the trapped in the woods surrounded by idiots. The kids have knives, the dog is stabbed and dies. I wouldn’t have apologised to the little bastard kids, poor dog I agree but that’s your queue to exit. Get the hell out, drive off with your keys. Again if you really want call the police. The kids had the weapon sort it amongst yourselves. Courtroom drama, movie over.

I’ll admit though the scenes in the woods showed an interesting mob mentality. I think that this is more of a socio-political comment than a decent horror.

I didn’t get any decent message from the film unless you count – always be the shitty family that leaves your kids to run riot and wonder where it all went wrong when they kill someone… is the message.

She immediately spots something wrong in the house and puh-lease! Would you have run into town where only an hour previous in the scenes it’s obvious the local community all know each other? Screw that, you get the hell out of Dodge to coin a phrase. Oh here’s another one CALL THE DAMN POLICE – movie over.

Anyways I think the point is that if it was supposed to be a shock-umentary on the state of decline between the youths/class or whatever it’s a pretty good example of how to piss off people. In fact play it against the riots you got a backdrop of everyone else in the country’s reason for annoyance, or maybe I am just so out of touch with reality that Chav mentality is the future. If so I prefer being out of touch. I don’t swear 24/7 to be heard, I don’t get violent and I don’t need to make others feel little to be a functioning part of society.

So in a nutshell watch it if you want a good rant at the TV, you like pointless and mindless violence, oh and you don’t five a damn yay!